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“Let your friends act for you. I was bawling so hard that the Nurse took pity on me and slipped me two Children’s Tylenol. Dese ere not schouts, as you faind, but jonkers on a vrolyk; and if dey'd chanshed to keel de vrow Sheppard's pet lamb, dey'd have done her a servish, by shaving it from dat unpleasant complaint, de hempen fever, with which its laatter days are threatened, and of which its poor vader died. He regretted now that in his idle hours he hadn't hunted up one against the rainy day. Both had lived rather quietly until a scandal had opened up a can of worms for the son, allegations of child abduction, reported sightings of a white van around nearby elementary schools.

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